Brotherhood Cafe
by Rose Tsukiyomi
Summary: Just a short spit of an interesting day at the Cafe with members from the brotherhood in modern times. Pranks will be pulled, tension, and teasing abounds.


_I know it's short lovelies, but I hit a brick wall and for what it is, I think it's perfectly good enough to post here and maybe inspire some spinoffs or other's imaginations to go wild like mine routinely does. Well, enjoy!_

* * *

"So, you must be the token woman working here eh?" a guy purrs with a smirk, his buddies jeer and poke one another as the other guys making orders and working behind the counter pause and glance to one another as I look at the man then smiles and leans on the counter comfortably.

"Yeah, but that was till you walked in the door sweet cheeks. Lemme guess, no fat, medium, three pumps sweetener and no foam, latte? Aka, a regular cup of coffee with three chemical sugar, and two shots of almond milk." I smirk at the guy who is flabbergasted while his buddies "oooh" and "god damn", teasing their buddy who I've pegged the order of perfectly while shooting him down with a nuke.

"That'll be $3.25 princess, cash or card?" I smirk at him after blindly tapping out the order on the screen then taps the button for him to pay card as he numbly taps his credit card, still gaping at me.

"Your order'll be down there. Enjoy, Princess." I wink with a wry smile as I straighten up, looking to his buddies. "Next." I hum, giving one of the guys a low five when they walk past snickering, the others all well used to my shut downs and dealing with unruly customers now that I've found my groove working here with them and been allowed to fly my "weird" banner high and proud.

Three more hours fly as we fall back into the quiet and usual of working in the cafe. I stand by with the mop as Ezio runs, laughing, from Altair who he's made off with the shirt of, Connor and Desmond joining me in the safe area out of the way of their chase and watching quietly like me.

* * *

"SHIT! BOSS!" I suddenly cry with convincing believability causing the two to crash into one another and fall into a heap on the floor which causes a bunch of us to crack up laughing, including some regulars watching the "children".

"I don't see him." Ezio finally untangles himself enough from the irritated man enough to look around causing many of us to crack up laughing or snickering as we drift off back to work, Desmond going over to help the two get sorted while Connor carries on to keep cleaning off the tables and chairs while I clean the floor.

"Mio, you're so mean to them." Ezio's friend Leonardo snickers to me while I mop past the table he's working on some new art on his computer.

"Keeps em, on their toes… Well, before they fall over." I smile while I carry on moping and he snickers.

"Hey Des, weren't you supposed to be at the bar in ten?" Jacob questions as he sets a drink on the pickup counter, calling out the order for pickup before beginning to clean the machines. I chuckle as Desmond curses, grabs his drink and boots out at full speed, many of us chuckling.

"God he's adorable flustered." I chuckle with a shake of my head.

"West, you've a call." Shay holds up the phone and I roll my eyes as I tuck the mop back into the bucket and brings it into the back where I catch the phone from him and heads out to the upper balcony we keep for our own use and breaks.

"You've reached Miss West at-" I hum on the phone in polite greeting as I light myself a smoke but stops and tucks my lighter away into my pocket as I puff on my half lit smoke, listening to the person on the other end of the phone with growing tension before I take the smoke from my lips.

"So you're telling me that if I don't play your game that's it then and the gloves are off?" I questions tensely, tapping the ash from my smoke off into the old tin can we use while the person reply's curtly.

"Aso-ga. (I see) Well then, I will state this once, so listen good and hard. You do anything to bring harm, discomfort, or _upset of absolutely any kind_ to those associated with and to me, family, friends, or my animals and I will show you how deep that rabbit hole of torment goes from my own personal experience. Starting with what and _WHO _you hold most dear. Now sweetheart, do not ever call me again looking to collect on the money my mother owes you, either find her yourself or send some flowers in apology for the cafe and this disgusting disruption of my work Mr Alize." I state with an icy cool while I continue smoking and looking directly at the person on the opposite rooftop to my own, listening to the pregnant silence on the other end of the phone while I keep calmly smoking.

"If you're staring at my man then, you know full well that I could shoot you dead for speaking to me like this." the man replies and I smirk calmly, tapping the ash off.

"I also know full well you're bluffing. If you're gonna shoot, -Bang- you don't talk, you just shoot." I state simply.

"What was that?!" he questions and I smirk darkly.

"Signore Juan will be speaking with you soon about disturbing me and making threats." I hum before hanging up the phone as the man, very worried questions loudly how I know THAT drug kingpin.

* * *

I pull out my personal phone and gives him a call. "Hello Mr Juan!" I greet as I light up another smoke looking down at the kids in the street playing with fireworks.

"Miss West, what brings you to call me?" the Portuguese elderly man hums with fatherly knowing.

"Mr Alize seems to mistake me for my mother when it comes to settling a debt she owes. I cautioned him against following through with his words, but it seems by his sniper across the street he's not heard a single word of warning and I was looking for guidance on how to handle the situation… You've always been so much help and wise in such matters." I muse with honest bemusement as if I'm speaking with a good friend looking for honest guidance and he replies in the same, talking to me like a younger friend or woman he's taken a kind feeling towards like a daughter.

"Mr Alize hm? Well don't you worry child, I will be in the area soon enough. We need to speak on some things so I will personally advise him about testing your temper. I know yours is certainly a testament to your Scottish heritage." he jokes in a warm and fond manor, chuckling some and I giggle, touching my head modestly as I pace.

"I'm still so sorry about going off on you like that. Gods I feel so dumb I took that all in the wrong way of your intention." I humorously muse in apology, making him chuckle more warmly.

"Always lovely to speak with you. Perhaps I might stop by that shop during my visit to see how you're doing. But I must go back to work and I'm sure smoking like that's taking you away from entertaining the guests with your fire." he hums knowing full well I'm on the patio smoking my second cig.

"Yes sir. Thank you again Mr Juan! If you can, I'd enjoy the visit very much." I hum before we both hang up and I take a long, relaxed drag from my smoke.

* * *

"Who the fuck was that?!" "Sounds like you just put a hit on someone." Shay and Malik state from the doorway as I carry on smoking comfortably, giving a slight wave to the sniper across the way as he straightens up, packing up to leave.

"I told you boys my past wasn't cookies and cream. And I know a lot of nasty folk on very friendly terms. After all, mom had to make money somehow for her debts and to make money in general." I drop my smoke into the can as I turn around and walk back inside calmly, ignoring their surprise.

"She, sold you?" Malik gapes, trying to wrap his head around this revelation as I begin downstairs calmly.

"Come on, let's get back to work before Altair does something to Ezio." I wave over my shoulder, pausing when there's a crash of pots and things followed by Italian cursing with Arabic.

"Never mind." I chuckle as I head down the stairs 2 at a time.

"Hey Alty, phone for you." I toss him the phone stopping the heated argument as I walk between the two.

"Phone's off." he looks at me confused.

"Yeah the caller said something about you two not having sex so loud in the back room and to clean up the mess when you're both done." I wink at the two as I stand in the doorway to the main area behind the counter and the back room, our coworkers and some customers hearing this cracking up laughing as the two blush a little then fire glares and start arguing all over again. I throw my arms in the air and walks out, jumping on a register to help get orders in.

"Sorry folks, I tried." I jokingly apologize causing more laughter as everyone (cept the two "flirting in back") get right to work.

* * *

"Seriously guys, if she's not gonna talk about it, there's – hey, Malik, come on." Connor tries to talk the whole group out of harassing me further after it spread what I told Shay and Malik while I'm on a lunch run during our Sunday "team meeting", which they all think I'm still out on, not listening in back while sorting out the food I picked up.

"Get out of my bag Malik." I hum casually as I walk out with a serving tray with the food properly plated, hopping the counter easily.

"You and Shay are pervs thinking my mother'd sell me for sex. She did try though, but a 3 year old's not really that appealing." I hum calmly as I set the tray down and takes my bag back, putting it on the floor.

"She kept my ass high for a good 6 years till some white picket fence, pro-life idiots caught wind, wound up dead, and it brought attention to the shit going on. I got shipped to my pops and he wound up dead cause I carved his eyes out for trying to rape me then gutted him in such a way when the cops came, he was still very much alive an hour later. It turned septic and that's why he died. A few cops quit after I took a lie detector and told 'em everything. I wound up bouncing through the system till I met Kya and her mom. Her mom hung my ass out to dry, took no shit, and they both drug my ass kicking, screaming, and fighting every inch out of the hole I'd dug and built me up into a person." I explain as I lay out the dishes and flips the tray in my hand totally calm as I look at them flatly.

"Now, some piss ant looking for that bitch thinks he can come threaten everything and everyone decent or are the reasons for my being alive today without consequences? Ha. I've no qualms dismembering someone. Wouldn't be the first time I dismembered someone slowly." I hum as I walk away to the counter, trying damn hard to keep a straight face but when Haytham looks at me flatly, shaking his head lightly I crumple to the ground laughing hysterically.

"TELL ME YOU GOT THAT ON CAMERA! PLEASE! OH GOD. THAT WAS TOO FUCKING GOOD!" I roll around laughing hysterically as Rebecca walks out from her hiding spot with a shit eating grin, laughing too.

"In high def." she boasts as tears stream down my red face while I flail and laugh hysterically.

"APRIL FOOLS!" I squeak out in time with five others before forcibly scrambling to my feet, vaulting the counter and taking off, still laughing as Haytham sips his tea quite amused, watching the others blink and snap into action, taking off in various directions after each of us pranksters.


End file.
